April’s 30 Days of Self-love Challenge

  1. Why are you starting this challenge?
  2. List 5 things you like about yourself?
  3. What are you going to start, stop, and/or continue to do for your mind?
  4. What are you going to start, stop, and/or continue to do for your body?
  5. What are you going to start, stop, and/or continue to do for your spirit?
  6. What are you going to start, stop, and/or continue to do for your emotions?
  7. What is your favorite feature on your body?
  8. What is something you do that you don’t like? What will you do to change it?
  9. What is something you’re going to do for yourself today?
  10. What is something about your personality that you like?
  11. What is a facial feature you like on yourself?
  12. What is something about the way you think that you like?
  13. When do you feel at your best and why?
  14. What are some compliments you heard recently about yourself that you like?
  15. What do you think people are attracted to you?
  16. What is a habit you have that you like?
  17. What is the last thing that made you smile?
  18. What is another thing you like about yourself?
  19. What do you think others like about your personality?
  20. What can you do to keep your peace of mind today?
  21. Do you like the way you are? Why or why not?
  22. What is your favorite compliment to give and receive? why?
  23. Do you feel good about yourself today? Why or why not?
  24. What is something you do to make you feel good about yourself?
  25. What is something you do yourself that makes you smile? Why?
  26. When do you feel most attractive? Why?
  27. Do you often accept compliments? If not, why not?
  28. If you don’t feel good about yourself, what do you do to change that, if anything?
  29. What’s another thing you like about yourself?
  30. Are you happy with yourself?
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Is Self-Care Enough to Create a Happy Life?

Self-Care is not enough to create a happy life. You cannot convince me that my life is going to be happier simply because I decided to bathe for an hour with a glass of wine. To get to the deeper issues is actually uncomfortable. I think there is a place for the self-care activities that are encouraged, such as going for a mindful walk or getting a body massage, but the missing piece is self-love. You can do a self- care activity and still face the same unresolved, untouched conflicts within yourself.

Self-love is an inward journey that we must all explore. Learning to love yourself correctly and unlearning the things that are not from a place of love. Also, there is a spiritual piece here. It is difficult to learn to love yourself without first accepting and recognizing your spiritual self.

Why are we not enjoying our lives?

We don’t love ourselves.

I believe the first step to a happier life is learning to love yourself correctly. If someone ask if you love yourself, you might say yes. But, I believe the way you treat people and how you interpret things stems from a reflection of how you feel about yourself and your life. Take a moment to reflect on this.

We have not addressed things from our past.

You have to keep asking yourself, “Why?” Question everything you do and figure out why you do it. Every belief, value, attitude, or opinion you have needs to be properly dissected and evaluated to see if it truly aligns with your core values. Many things we learned from the past we simply accept and never question it. You believe this because you were told to believe it, or you do that because somebody told you to do it. You never asked why.

We don’t have time for ourselves.

I agree that self-care is great for encouraging people to take time for themselves and restore some balance in their overwhelming lives. Many of us ever spend a second alone. Maybe you don’t like being alone? You ever asked yourself why you don’t like this? How will you get to know yourself and heal if you never spend time alone. Try to set aside 10-15 minutes a day to self-reflect.

I hope this helps you take the first few steps towards living a happy life. Also, check out my new YouTube channel. We discuss this topic in more detail https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5u55nfMVgVM&feature=youtu.be

5 Benefits of Waking Up Early

Before I became an early riser, I used to always feel like the day was getting away from me. I would only have just enough time to do exactly what I needed to do in that moment. I felt like I had no time to do anything and no time for myself.

One day I decided that I was going to take control of my day. I was going to create a morning routine that would allow me to not feel rushed, provide enough time to do self-improvement activities, and simply enjoy my time.

Here are some things I love about being an early riser.

1. Quiet & alone time.

There is just something about the quiet and stillness of the mornings that I love. It’s still dark outside, everyone is asleep, and I can just be alone. Because I’m not interacting with anyone in the morning, I am quietly reflecting and listening to my thoughts.

2. Better mental health.

It’s better for my mental health because I am not stressing about being rushed or not having enough time to complete a task. Also, I have time to engage in activities that promote good mental health like journaling, meditating, and working out.

3. More productive.

I believe that I’m able to be more productive because I have time to visualize my day. I’m more intentional about how I organize how to spend my time.

4. Self-care time.

I wake up early enough to make time for self-care activities such as meditating, making a delicious, soul-serving breakfast, reading something inspiring to encourage positive thinking.

5. Accomplish goals.

I’m more organized and intentional about how I spend my time and I’m able to make time for goals. Also, in the mornings I have time to reflect and evaluate where I am with my goals in case I need to scale back and revise my action plan.

10 Baby Shower Gifts Ideas That Are Actually Useful

It seems like everyone you know decided they will get pregnant around the same time, and now you have to attend lots of baby showers. Maybe you’re not sure what to gift them, but you want to buy an item that they will actually use.

Here is a list of items I actually used and loved after my baby was born.

1. Fisher- Price Sit-Me-Up Floor Seat

I absolutely love this item! My baby doesn’t like to be on his back for long, and noticed when I propped him up, he really enjoys sitting up like a big boy. I use this every day while I’m doing chores around the house.

2. Boppy Newborn Lounger, Elephant Love Gray

This Boppy is like a rite of passion item. All new parents have this item for their newborn babies. It’s very comfortable for the baby to lay in.

3. Dr. Brown’s Original Bottle Specialty Feeding Starter Kit

It’s difficult to know what type of bottles are preferred, but I think Dr. Brown’s bottles are awesome. They have these special tubes that helps reduce the amount of air sucked in by the baby.

4. Baby Carrier

This was a great gift because at times with a newborn it’s hard to move around and do things with a baby in your arms. This gives parents a little freedom to move around, and use both hands.

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5. Burping Clothes

You can ever have too many burping cloths!

6. Baby Jumpsuits

I just love the baby jumpsuits! When buying clothes for newborns: 1. Do not buy a lot of newborn sizes (babies grow super fast) sizes 0-3months or 3-6 months are a good rule of thumb, 2. Be mindful of the current and future seasons. You don’t want to buy the baby a cute winter jacket you saw now, but they won’t be able to wear until the middle of summer.

7. Baby Grooming or Bathing Kits

I got so many starter kits with baby lotions and washing soaps that I will not have to buy any for the rest of the year. This is a much needed gift.

8. Diapers

This is the safest gift you could buy. Babies will always need diapers. The baby will probably outgrow the newborn sizes really soon, so try to buy sizes 1 and up. We were gifted various sizes of diapers, and that really helped us in the long run.

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9. Baby Wipes

Next to diapers, this is the best gift ever! I cannot tell you how often we run through baby wipes. Even if you buy somethings else, just throw baby wipes in the gift bag along with it because they will need them.

10. Gift Cards

Gift cards are helpful because items that new parents run out of, or didn’t receive at the baby shower can be purchased later.

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My Nightly Self Care Routine

I believe it’s essential to incorporate a daily and nightly self-care routine in our lives. A morning routine is necessary to equip your mind, body, and spirit for what the day brings. Then, at night, you release all that does not serve you, and reflect, rebuild and restore yourself, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Check out my 5AM morning routine here.

This is how and why I chose this nightly self-care routine.

Take a hot bath.

Around 8:30PM, I take a bath. I sometimes throw in a bath bomb , or soak in lavender to soothe my body. I like to listen to music, an entertaining podcast show, or the quiet while I bathe.

Massage with lotion and oil.

My skin gets so dry (maybe from taking baths) so I like to give my body a good dose of vitamin E from lotions and seal it with Shea Moisture’s body oil products.


Clean my teeth.

Brushing and flossing your teeth is a good self-care habit to adopt. I make sure to practice this daily in my routine.

Drink hot tea.

My absolute favorite tea right now is the Celestial Seasonings Herbal Tea Country Peach Passion flavor tea! It is so delicious! I read that some benefits from drinking this tea are the antioxidant vitamin C, it helps counter the harmful affects if free radicals in the body, and it’s caffeine free to help you feel relaxed.

Read/ Reflect.

I try to stay off social media after 8PM because I could easily read something to disrupt the positive energy I created in the room. I try to spend the rest of the night writing in my journal to release whatever is on my mind. I make a to-do list for the next day. I also like to read a few pages from a book.

My routine takes me about an hour and a half. Since I have a baby, I go to sleep when he goes to sleep, which right now is around 10PM. Then, when he wakes up around 12AM to feed again, I wake up and go back to sleep until around 5AM.

As you can see, I may not be getting an adequate amount of sleep these days, but I don’t mind as long as I can have a moment alone for self-care.


My Simple House Cleaning Routine

My Simple House Cleaning Routine

As a new mom, it can be difficult keeping the house clean while tending to a baby. I believe it’s important to establish a cleaning routine that makes house work less overwhelming and stressful.

My routine is spread throughout the week and year because if I try to do everything at one time, or let things build up, I get overwhelmed. I’m going to talk about my routine, and hopefully, it will help you create your own.

Daily Cleaning Routine

The first thing I do after waking up is make up my bed. After I eat breakfast, I clean the kitchen by wiping down the countertops and table with Lysol Wipes, unloading and loading the dish washer, and sweeping the floor. I run the dishwasher every other day and load dishes before I go to bed.

At the end of each day, I take a small basket and pick up random clothes, towels or shoes that are out of place just to keep everything tidy.

Weekly Cleaning Routine

I have a specific chore I do for certain days of the week:

Monday’s I do laundry and fold clothes.

Tuesday’s, I clean out the refrigerator and make sure trash is gathered since my husband takes the trash out on Wednesdays.

Thursday’s, I clean the bathrooms by wiping down the countertops, shower, tubs, and toilets.

Saturday’s, I wash the comforters and sheets. Also, I like to deodorize my carpets and vacuum the floors. This is also the day I clean my wood floors.

Monthly Cleaning Routine

Once a month, I take on a tedious cleaning task like vacuuming the stairs because it takes a little longer to do that. Also, dusting the light fixtures, ceiling fans, and other areas that collect dust.

Yearly Cleaning Routine

There are some home projects I do once or twice a year. I hire a professional to clean my floors and carpet. I also wipe down the windows in my home and wash the curtains.

These are my simple cleaning routines to maintain a tidy home. Please share any tips or your favorite cleaning products!

My 5AM Morning Routine

I’ve decided to write out my morning routine for individuals or new mommies who are interested in developing or revising their own morning routines. As you are creating your own routine, make sure to list reasons why you incorporate certain activities.  I’ve learned that if you don’t know your ‘why’ then it won’t stick.  

I believe morning routines are an essential part of my personal growth because it is one of the only times of the day where I have a moment alone. My routine is pretty similar to the one I had before giving birth to my son, the only adjustment is that I have to be a little more flexible.  For example, I used to wake up right around 5 o’clock, now I’m either up before or a little after because if the baby wakes up I have to stop and feed him. I’m breastfeeding, by the way.

For the first month or so I didn’t practice my routine because I was still adjusting to the new baby. Babies can throw everything off, but the routine is very helpful because I’m feeling like I have somewhat a sense of control over my life again.  

Having a morning routine is also important because I like having structure in my life to balance not only ‘me time’, but to make sure I get everything I need to get done.  So it gives me a sense of taking care of my responsibilities and my self-care needs.

I’m going to breakdown each activity I incorporated in my routine and the significance of each event.

Wake up around 5AM.

The reason I say around 5AM is because like I was saying before, the baby is unpredictable. If he wakes up before 5AM, I wake up to feed him. I have to fight the urge to go back to sleep because breastfeeding also makes you feel sleepy. Also, if he wakes up once I get started in the morning, I will stop whatever I’m doing to feed him.

Waking up at 5AM is NOT EASY! You need to have good reasons to get up that early. One reason is since my husband is still at home during that time to help me with the baby, I can have some time to myself. My mind is constantly on the baby and I’m thinking about what he needs and is he okay.

Prayer & Gratitude.

It’s something about the quiet and stillness of mornings that makes me feel more connected to God. I feel it is the perfect time for my daily devotion and inward reflection.

One of the first things I do in the mornings is say a prayer asking God to provide what I need and to help me be open to what He’s saying to me. I also take some time to reflect on what I am thankful for. (I try to write this down every morning because I hear it sticks better, but honestly, I don’t do it every morning.) I also read a daily devotional from my bible app on my phone. This allows me to reflect on his word and try to understand how it applies to my life.

I believe it’s important to start your day with some type of reflection or spiritual guidance so that sets the tone for your day. Change starts in our minds, so this is a way to train your mind to think about positive things. It’s like building a protective shield in your mind to combat the stressors and worries of the day. You cannot control everything, but you can choose how you think about it.

Drink Water


My goal is to drink 8 cups of water a day. I start drinking what’s equal to 2 cups of water in the morning. I set the water by my bed in the morning to make sure I get this done. I also drink another 2 cups after I workout in the mornings. So by the end afternoon, I’ve already had 4 cups of water!


Water is important to help us stay hydrated. There was a time when I used to wake up with back pains and I was always feeling fatigued. Drinking water helped stop the back pains I was feeling, which was caused by dehydration. Dehydration caused me to feel tired throughout the day. Also, drinking lots of water is important to do while you breastfeed. I have to be intentional about this because I will forget to drink it.

Yoga/ Workout.

I used to hate working out. For the longest, I felt no desire to workout because I am naturally slim and it’s not like I’m trying to lose weight. I think most people are motivated to lose weight and I had to really think about what was going to drive me to incorporate some type of workout routine since I know, for a fact, this is important to stay healthy.

I chose to practice yoga because of it’s spiritual ties. Yoga is a form of meditation which allows me to destress and turn off my mind to just focus on the now. Be present. Also, overtime you become more flexible and toned. Even if you don’t practice yoga, any type of morning exercise helps keep you focused and productive. When I finish my routine, I feel energized and refreshed!

Right now I watch YouTube videos and practice a 30-day beginner challenges, but eventually I want to start attending regular yoga courses in the mornings.

Breakfast.

Breakfast is my favorite meal of the day! My biggest motivation for being an early riser, is being able to take my time, and enjoy a delicious meal. I just love having some combination of eggs, toast, bacon, grits, sausages, pancakes, oatmeal, yogurt, fresh fruits, or enjoying a breakfast sandwich in the mornings for breakfast. You can definitely tell when I haven’t had breakfast yet.

Tidy Up the Kitchen.

When I finish breakfast, I like to clean up the kitchen right after. I will wipe down the table and counters, unload or load the dishwasher, and sweep the floor.

Listen to Podcast or Audiobook.

While I make breakfast or clean up, I like to listen to something positive whether that be a podcast from Optimal Living Daily, Oprah’s Super Soul Conversations, Joyce Meyers, or Joel Osteen. I also like to listen to The Casey Crew with DJ Envy and his wife, Gia Casey. I sometimes listen to some type of self improvement audiobook. I enjoy listening because they’re all positive, it challenges me to reflect and reevaluation my attitudes and behaviors, and motivates me to be the best version of myself.

Shower/ Brush My Teeth.

A morning shower makes me feel clean and refreshed. I also brush my teeth and practice flossing daily. I don’t always wear make-up, but I like to think I look nice with or without it.

Household Chore.

Depending on the day of the week, I do some type of household chore. I might spend one morning washing and folding clothes, another washing the bed sheets, vacuuming or mopping floors, or cleaning the bathrooms. I like to space out the chores so I don’t get overwhelmed or feel out of control. Also, keeping a tidy home makes me feel good about my home and allows me to be productive with other projects because I’m not worrying about what needs to get done around the house. You can read more about my simple house cleaning routine here.

Get to the Business.

When I finish all of my morning activities, I like to fix me a cup of coffee that I make in my Keurig. I create a to-do list for the day and begin working on whatever project that needs attention. My goal everyday is to focus on completing at least 3 productive tasks.

I hope this helps inspire you to create a morning routine that fits you. Remember, it will not stick unless you understand your ‘why’.

Check out my nightly self-care routine here.

The 5 Friends You Need

1.Spiritual Friend

These friends will remind you to stay prayed up, in the word, and grounded  

friends 7.jpg

2.Life Coach Friend

This friend is like a walking “How to” book and gives you advice on things like buying your first car, moving into a new place, questions to ask when looking for an insurance company, etc.

Friends

3.Turn Up Buddy

This friend is the life of the party! Whatever birthday, party, trip to the mall, trip to the gas station – it doesn’t matter, just know you’re going to have a good time doing it with them.

friends 5

4.Petty Betty

When you need to vent about a person and you want someone to be on your side, call Petty Betty because they will justify and validate everything you do even if you’re absolutely in the wrong.  Petty Betty is also one to call when you need someone to hype you up before you confront a person and tell them about themselves.

friends 4

5.Voice of Reason

Make sure you call this friend right after you talk to Petty Betty.  This friend is able to give good advice and see all perspectives in a given situation.  Petty Better may make you feel like you’re always in the right, but Voice of Reason will tell you about yourself and help you make the right decisions.

friends 6

5 Signs You Need New Friends

I hear ladies talking about how they hate being around other females, or how they rather have guy friends.  One or two things could be going on, 1. You are a bad friend, or 2. You don’t know how to choose good girlfriends.  And there is nothing wrong with having guy friends, I have a few, but it’s something different about having girlfriends.  I also wonder if  deep down you desire to have female friends, but you don’t know how to pick the right ones.

I have definitely experienced having bad friends.  I was friends with some girls who would pick at me constantly and make me the “butt” of all jokes.  I would leave from them feeling bad about myself.  I guess I kept taking the abuse because I wanted to be their  friend.  Also, just like any relationship, sometimes you don’t notice the abuse until you leave.

Here are signs you need new friends:

1.They make you feel bad.

One obvious sign is observing how you feel when you’re with them.   If your friends are making you feel bad, these are not your real friends.  

5 signs you need new friends 3

 

  1. They try to influence you to partake in things that you know are wrong.

If your friends are trying to talk you into doing things that you know are wrong, and they try to make you feel “lame” for not participating, those are not your friends. Your friends should push you to be a better person.  They should also work on improving themselves. Remember iron sharpens iron.

5 signs you need new friends

  1. They treat you like the “butt of all jokes”

Do you have  friends who target you when telling jokes, and the jokes seem to go little too far? Do you feel like you’re the only one being picked on in your circle of friends, even in front of others outside of your group?   This type of behavior can stem from them either being jealous of you, or for some reason they want you to feel bad about yourself. ( I don’t know, but I guess it’s not meant for me to understand because I’m not a bad friend.)

5 signs you need new friends 4

  1. They talk to you about other friends.

If your friends are coming to you to talk bad about another friend behind their back, those are not your friends.  There is a difference between having a legit concern about a friend and you just want to discuss it over with someone else in your close circle. But, the way I see it, if you’re talking trash about a friend who is as close to you as we are, you will do the same thing to me.

5 signs you need new friends 2

  1. You feel like an outcast.

When you’re around people pretending to be your friend, you can always tell if something isn’t right.  Listen to your gut.  You also feel like everyone knows something and you’re out of the loop.

5 signs you need new friends 5

I know it’s hard to see if people are really here for you.  For me, it took some time, but eventually I separated myself from that group of females.  Now I have a great group of friends who encourage, support, and love me for who I am.  
Remember, don’t stay around people who make you feel bad about yourself, or people who just make it hard for you to feel comfortable being yourself.  Eventually, you will find people who will appreciate you.

10 Things I Find Sexy About My Husband

1.When he puts his shoes away, and I’m not tripping over them when I walk in the front door. 

2.When he cooks a nice dinner.

3.When he’s playing basketball/football/baseball.

4.When he comes out to grab the groceries and says, “Baby you can go ahead, I got this” (Anytime he says “I. GOT. THIS.”)

5.When he takes out the trash.

6.When he grows his beard out!

7.When he cleans my car, or take it to get an oil change.(OoOOooWeee)

8.When he comes to my rescue and kills a bug! (My hero)

9.When I beg him to go grocery shopping with me, and he pushes the cart!

10.And of course, when he washes the dishes.

What are some things you find sexy about your partner?

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