I hear ladies talking about how they hate being around other females, or how they rather have guy friends. One or two things could be going on, 1. You are a bad friend, or 2. You don’t know how to choose good girlfriends. And there is nothing wrong with having guy friends, I have a few, but it’s something different about having girlfriends. I also wonder if deep down you desire to have female friends, but you don’t know how to pick the right ones.
I have definitely experienced having bad friends. I was friends with some girls who would pick at me constantly and make me the “butt” of all jokes. I would leave from them feeling bad about myself. I guess I kept taking the abuse because I wanted to be their friend. Also, just like any relationship, sometimes you don’t notice the abuse until you leave.
Here are signs you need new friends:
1.They make you feel bad.
One obvious sign is observing how you feel when you’re with them. If your friends are making you feel bad, these are not your real friends.
- They try to influence you to partake in things that you know are wrong.
If your friends are trying to talk you into doing things that you know are wrong, and they try to make you feel “lame” for not participating, those are not your friends. Your friends should push you to be a better person. They should also work on improving themselves. Remember iron sharpens iron.
- They treat you like the “butt of all jokes”
Do you have friends who target you when telling jokes, and the jokes seem to go little too far? Do you feel like you’re the only one being picked on in your circle of friends, even in front of others outside of your group? This type of behavior can stem from them either being jealous of you, or for some reason they want you to feel bad about yourself. ( I don’t know, but I guess it’s not meant for me to understand because I’m not a bad friend.)
- They talk to you about other friends.
If your friends are coming to you to talk bad about another friend behind their back, those are not your friends. There is a difference between having a legit concern about a friend and you just want to discuss it over with someone else in your close circle. But, the way I see it, if you’re talking trash about a friend who is as close to you as we are, you will do the same thing to me.
- You feel like an outcast.
When you’re around people pretending to be your friend, you can always tell if something isn’t right. Listen to your gut. You also feel like everyone knows something and you’re out of the loop.
I know it’s hard to see if people are really here for you. For me, it took some time, but eventually I separated myself from that group of females. Now I have a great group of friends who encourage, support, and love me for who I am.
Remember, don’t stay around people who make you feel bad about yourself, or people who just make it hard for you to feel comfortable being yourself. Eventually, you will find people who will appreciate you.